Singaporean musician couple Lou Peixin, 32, and Daniel Chia, 38, have been married for seven years.

Their lives were full and fast-paced, and they did not desire nor see the need to have children.

Peixin and Daniel’s church wedding in 2019.

Peixin – whose stage name is Miss Lou – is a popular jazz singer-songwriter. She performs frequently with her husband, who is a saxophonist.

Peixin and Daniel performing at an event as part of the Singapore Night Festival in 2022.

“We felt like we didn’t need a child to complete our family and we were happy doing our work in music and ministry. So we already felt very contented,” said Peixin, who served actively with her husband in various Christian ministries on top of their music careers.  

Peixin and Daniel helping with a Mandarin EP recording in 2022 with Awaken Generation.

“Our parents or society did not pressure us to have kids either, and we were in a comfortable bubble,” she told Salt&Light.

The rising trend of DINKs

Peixin and Daniel belonged to a growing class of childless-by-choice couples emerging across Asia, otherwise known as the DINKs (Dual Income, No Kids).

Local statistics show that in 2024, 15 per cent of resident ever-married (those who are currently married, divorced or widowed) women aged between 40 and 49 have no children. This is double the 7.1 per cent in 2004.

In 2022, however, their stance on not having children began to be challenged.

That year, they had signed up to attend Bethel worship school in Redding, California as they wanted to pursue a deeper understanding of what it meant to be a worshipper.

Peixin could not contain her excitement and announced that she was heading to Bethel on Instagram.

Unexpectedly, she received a private message from an American stranger called Faye, who told her that she got to know of her from a Mandarin worship song that she had recorded for a worship missions organisation called Awaken Generation.

Faye texted Peixin to ask if she could come and pray for them in Redding.

“If it’s not inconvenient for you, sure, I’d love to meet you,” Peixin replied.

“She said it’s not inconvenient for her as it’s just a six-hour drive from Oregon, where she lives, to Redding. To me that was pretty shocking, but she really wanted to do it,” Peixin recounted.

The couple, together with the two friends on the same Bethel trip, met Faye on a Saturday night for dinner.

Daniel and Peixin met Faye (bottom, left) for the first time over a Mexican dinner in Bethel in 2022.

Faye slept overnight in her van which she parked in the driveway of their Airbnb accommodation. All of them went for Sunday service together the next day.

All of them went to Sunday service together.

Before Faye left to make her six-hour drive back home to Oregon, all of them said their goodbyes. As Peixin accompanied Faye to the driveway, she noticed her stalling for a while before saying: “This is going to be uncomfortable and awkward. I don’t want this to get in the middle of your marriage, but the Lord is not letting me leave until I release this word.”

Then she asked Peixin if she and Daniel were planning to have children, and Peixin told her the truth that they had no desire for children and were not trying for a child.

A child from your loins 

Faye went on to deliver the word of knowledge that she had received from God.

“The Lord told me that there would be a baby in your future, a child from your loins. This child would increase your capacity and not reduce it,” Faye told her.

Peixin was shocked. Faye – whom she has just met 12 hours ago – had just touched on two very specific reasons why she and Daniel did not want to have kids. They were afraid that having a child would limit their impact and ministry for God. Even if they would have a child, having their own felt like a “selfish thought” instead of fostering or adopting one of the many children out there who needed a home.

Before she left, Faye also put one hand on Peixin’s head and one hand on her abdomen and prayed for healing, adding that whatever was happening in her gut was affecting fertility.

“That was another specific thing because she could not have known that I have had irregular periods all my life and a TCM doctor I saw said its linked to my gut. But that never bothered me before because we were not trying for kids,” Peixin told Salt&Light.

She thanked Faye for her boldness and obedience in releasing God’s word in faith and they parted.

Peixin’s prayer that day went: “God, if it is really Your will for Daniel and I to have biological children, then You tell me Yourself. I want to hear from You directly since this is a big, big decision.”

But there was no time to linger and ponder more on this unusual incident as the couple were about to head into one week of worship school the next day.

Daniel and Peixin, with their two friends Sandra and Cheryl, attended Bethel Worship School.

At the end of the first day, there was a worship session to end off the first night. By then, the presence of God was so thick and heavy in the place that Peixin was down on the floor, weeping so much she had snot all over her face.

Her body houses her musical instrument

God asked her then: “Do you trust Me with your body?”

Immediately, she knew why God shot her that question.

It was difficult for her to answer because she knew that bearing a child could take a physical toll on the body. For Peixin, this concern was accentuated as it could affect her music career and body image. As a singer, her body houses her musical instrument. As part of her branding as a retro jazz singer, her characteristic style included donning form-fitting vintage dresses and unforgiving cheongsams.

Kari Jobe and Cody Carnes in a worship Q&A at Bethel Worship School.

Yet she had experienced God’s faithfulness in her life. So, while crying, with her face on the floor, she told God: “Yes, I trust You with my body.”

In response, He dropped her a baby boy’s name: “Judah”.

Peixin kept the name to herself, and did not even share this detail with her husband when she later told him about Faye’s word and her encounter with God during the worship session.

“It takes two people to make a baby. So God needs to speak to me directly too,” Daniel replied his wife non-committally.

Unlike his wife, he did not pray about it.

“That was how far removed the concept of having kids was for me,” said Daniel.

The couple resumed their busy lives once they returned to Singapore.

It was business as usual, except that Peixin began noticing an obvious change in her body. As she had always tracked her periods, she realised that – for once in her lifetime – they had become regular for the next six months.

Still, the couple did not actively start trying for a child.

A year after their US trip, Peixin and Daniel went to Sydney for a Hillsong conference in July 2023.

Peixin at the Hillsongs conference in 2023.

Post-conference, they extended the trip for a holiday.

Finally, they had some time to themselves. As they took a long walk from one beach to another and chatted along the way, Peixin brought up the topic of children.

Revisiting the topic of having children, or not 

“Shall we revisit the reasons why we don’t want to have kids, poke holes at them and see if our beliefs still hold?” she asked Daniel. He agreed.

The couple decided to talk about their stance on having children during a beach walk in Sydney.

The first reason that they examined: Why bring a child into a broken world that is filled with suffering and pain?

As they talked, they realised that they would be thinking like non-believers if they were to subscribe to the view that there is no point in bringing a child into a fallen world.

“Others who do not believe in God or life beyond this earth would argue this way. But if we say we are believers who believe that Jesus is coming back, that we would be resurrected and there would be no more tears or sorrow, then this reason wouldn’t hold ground,” Peixin reasoned.

They moved on to their second reason: Having children would impede their ministry.

At that time, they were using their God-given gifts in music and content creation to serve their church (Grace Methodist Church), an external ministry (Awaken Generation) as well as other churches in Singapore.

Sharing her testimony and songs at Queenstown Baptist Church.

“But what we did not realise was that the ministry of discipling children would be above and beyond any impact or significance we would make in the Kingdom from our giftings or the strength of our hands. Instead, children would make a great addition to the Kingdom,” said Peixin.

With two reasons thrown out of the window, the couple went on to discuss the third reason – the impact of having children on their careers.

“Being from an elite girls school which is quite feminist in their thinking, I was told that I can be as good or even better than a man in my career. Career became my identity and idol,” said Peixin.

The couple performing at The Singapore Business Awards in 2022.

As a freelance musician, every hour was a potential “billable” hour. The couple filled their days with music production and teaching sessions, and their nightly gigs ran late into the night. Usually, they only crept into bed in the wee hours of the morning. Such a lifestyle would be incompatible with raising a child, they felt.

They performed at a Bulgari launch in 2023.

With pregnancy also came the risks of putting on weight and other complications, which in turn may affect her body image and career. Closely tied to her music career was her sense of self-worth and significance.

“That was why God asked me if I trusted Him, not only with my body, but as an extension, my health, my career and my income. As believers, we realised that our trust in Him needs to be total and complete. Holding back felt like disobedience,” she told Salt&Light.

Blinded by cultural narratives of the age

“Having a child is the ultimate surrender as there are so many things out of our control,” she added.

The more the couple discussed, the more they realised that they had been blinded by the cultural narratives of the age that having a child was unwise and undesirable.

“The scales from our eyes fell. We began to perceive that, of course, the devil would want us to stop us from having godly kids by blinding us with these lies. Stewarding a child given by God is actually a form of true and proper worship,” said Daniel.

Ultimately, they were faced with the question of whether they would lay down their pride and “security blankets” – their identity and income as musicians – to have a child if God wanted to bless them with one.

God had already blessed their careers, especially Peixin’s. Big companies, such as banks, requested for her and she was also performing in national events such as the Formula 1 races and River Hongbao celebrations. In a good month, she could easily take home some S$30,000 to S$50,000.

Peixin and Daniel performing at a UOB’s dinner and dance event.

“If we were going to have a child, we wanted to give our 100 per cent and be full-time parents. We knew we didn’t want to pass the kid off to our parents or a maid when we had to leave for gigs. So we had to be prepared to give up our careers,” said Peixin.

By the end of their walk, both of them had reached a consensus.

“We were willing to surrender all these if God wanted to give us a child to steward,” said Peixin.

Making room in their lives 

When they returned to Singapore, they took steps to recalibrate their lives.

Daniel began paying more attention to managing their investment portfolio, so that they could rely on passive income should they need to become full-time parents in future.

They stopped using birth control and Peixin began tracking her monthly fertile period as they started trying for a child.

Yet month after month went by, and she was still not pregnant.

As they waited for a child, however, once again they began to be sucked in by the frenetic pace of life in Singapore.

Peixin’s career was taking flight and doors in China were opening for her.

In August 2024, she received a National Arts Council grant to do four shows in Shanghai.

Miss Lou performed to a sold out crowd at Jazz at Lincoln Center Shanghai.

A seven-city tour in China, or a total of 10 shows, was slated for December.

Peixin and Daniel on tour in China in December 2024.

“We told ourselves we were doing all these things for God – serving in church, going into the marketplace and the nations, and proclaiming His goodness through these channels and on our social media platforms,” said Peixin.

Yet the reality was all of that hustle and bustle took a toll on their quiet time and prayer life. After work, all they wanted to do at night was to vegetate in front of the television or mindlessly scroll through their social media accounts.

Peixin and Daniel performing in Wuhan, China.

One morning in October, they had a particularly explosive argument. Daniel thought he could finally have some me-time that day but Peixin misunderstood his intentions and felt that his actions showed that he did not care about her.

During the argument, Daniel said a line that broke Peixin’s heart.

“I can’t think of the last time when I had a free day in my Google calendar,” he told her. Working and living together made enforcing personal boundaries difficult.

These arguments usually returned to haunt them once every few months. Both of them knew that they needed to do something about it or their marriage would be in danger.

They decided that it was time for them to take a long break and do a reset of their lives.

Daniel looked at their packed calendar and noted that they had bookings all the way till February the following year.

So, they made sure to block off their schedule from February 2025 onwards, with the plan to go on a sabbatical for six months or longer, if necessary.

Will you choose the wilderness? 

At that time, they were reading a book by Samuel Whitefield titled Will You Choose the Wilderness?

“Instead of the wilderness being a place of trial or testing, the book posits the concept of the wilderness as a place of communion with God and dependence on God alone. It explores the life of John the Baptist who went into the wilderness to be with God and him not needing much of anything else. I felt an urgent need for us to rest and be with God, instead of treating busyness as a badge of honour in our lives,” Peixin said.

She was worried if their motives were right in taking extended time off, or if it was just a form of escapism. But after praying and receiving confirmations from God, they began taking steps to simplify their lives in order to prepare for the upcoming sabbatical.

That involved pruning the excess in their lives, as they were even prepared not to return to Singapore if God so directed them to do so.

At the peak, Daniel used to have some 40 saxophones. He sold most of them, whittling down his precious collection to four as he could only bring one along for the sabbatical.

Daniel with his saxophone in their studio.

In case they did not return, Daniel informed his saxophone students about his impending departure and began finding replacement teachers for them.

Peixin also cleared her wardrobe. More crucially, she deleted most of her social media apps as she found her daily screentime embarrassingly long.

Before they departed for their sabbatical, they had a gathering with close friends. Over dinner, they shared with their friends the prophetic word that Faye gave to Peixin and how they were now open to having children.

Cheryl, who was at the dinner table and who was one of the two friends who had travelled with them to Bethel years ago, suddenly piped up.

She whipped out her phone and showed them a note she had made on her phone back in June 2022, months before the Bethel trip.

God had also given her a word for Peixin then, though she did not feel it was time to release it to her until that moment at the dinner table.

The note read: “A child from rest”.

Cheryl recorded the word of knowledge she received for Peixin on her phone and only conveyed it to her years later.

“It was incredible because it means on the same trip, there were two different people who received words of knowledge for us when we weren’t even seeking a child.” Peixin marvelled.

She and Daniel left the gathering feeling encouraged that God had not only prophesied the gender of their child, but also the timing of it – way back from the time when they had not even known that they would be going for a sabbatical.

In February 2025, the couple left for Menorca, an island in Spain. The plan was to spend some time there, before heading to Istanbul and then Cape Town.

It was off season at Menorca so they could secure cheap accommodation. As there was nothing happening there, they felt it would be a good place for them to get away from their routines in Singapore and realign with God.

Their Airbnb accommodation in Menorca, Spain.

Though they expected a quiet island, they were still in for a rude shock when they arrived. The island had just emerged from winter, and all the shops were closed. The closest grocery store was an expensive cab ride away.

“For the first two weeks there, we both felt miserable and uncomfortable. We had to ration out the groceries we had and cook all of our meals,” said Daniel.

A time for “rehab” 

Faced with all the silence and having nothing to do there, both of them had to confront the noise within themselves.

“Are you happy?” Peixin asked Daniel. Without the distractions of work, Netflix and social media, they could finally engage in deeper conversations.

“Why did you bring us here, God?” Peixin lamented to God as she strolled on the beach.  

God dropped a word in her heart: “Rehab”.

Instantly, she knew what He meant. She and Daniel were already feeling the withdrawal symptoms from being away from their usual busy city life. Though she had deleted all her social media apps, her muscle memory led her fingers to go to the same spots on her phone screen.

By the third week of their stay there, however, they found themselves beginning to enjoy the slower pace of life there. As there was nothing much to do, they slept early and woke early. They lingered in God’s word and in His presence.

After a month in Menorca, they flew to Bilbao, a city in Spain.

It was a bustling city and they headed to San Sebastian, the birthplace of the Basque cheesecake.

Being in Basque country, they felt they had to try the cheesecake. As they savoured its rich creaminess, a wave of nausea overtook Peixin.

The rich and creamy Basque cheesecake that the couple thought was the reason behind Peixin’s nausea.

“I thought it was due to the cheesecake and my body’s reaction to suddenly having such rich food after all the simple meals we had back in Menorca,” said Peixin.

Yet days went by and the nausea never left. They suspected that she could be pregnant but it was too early to do a pregnancy test.

So they soldiered on to Istanbul as they were just over one month in for their sabbatical.

But in the wee hours of one morning, Peixin was feeling so nauseated and homesick that she was up searching for Teochew porridge recipes on YouTube.

That was when she saw the glare of Daniel’s mobile phone on his face as well. It turned out that he was feeling the same way and was searching for flights back to Singapore.

“I think we felt like we were ready to leave the wilderness. It was time to test whether we could still come back to Singapore and yet hold our boundaries and live a fasted life of rest,” said Daniel.

Conceived on the first week of their sabbatical 

They were welcomed home with good news. Peixin’s pregnancy was confirmed. Just before they left for the sabbatical, she had stopped tracking her monthly fertile period in an act of surrender and trust in God’s timing.  

When they went to the gynaecologist, they found out that her baby was already 10 weeks old.

First ultrasound scan at 10 weeks

“From the ultrasound, we saw a well-developed baby with limbs and a head. When we tracked back the timing, the baby was likely conceived on the first week of our sabbatical,” noted Daniel.  

“We had been trying for almost a year by then, but this baby came at a time truly as ‘a child from rest’,” an overjoyed Peixin told Salt&Light.

Her baby did turn out to be a boy and they will be naming him “Judah” when he arrives in November.

Both Peixin and Daniel intend to scale back on their careers for now, and be fully involved as full-time parents. God also gave them and their friends a ministry in Singapore to steward called Attap House, a loose community where any believer can drop by to join in a time of worship and fellowship. 

Peixin, six months pregnant, with the Attap House ministry.

Looking back to when they received their first prophetic word about the baby three years ago, they are keenly aware that God’s timing is perfect.

“He knew the obstacles that He had to overcome in our hearts and how we were not ready then,” said Daniel.

Said Peixin: “God is so intentional and gentle in nudging us forward. We know He loves us and this child so much, and we can’t wait to see what He has in store for Judah.”

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