Growing up in Kota Kinabalu, Sabah, Soo Shereen was 12 years old when she realised she was attracted to both boys and girls.

“It was confusing and I didn’t know what was happening, but it didn’t feel wrong,” said the artist and baker, now 35.

What began as quiet questions in her teenage years led her to experience various types of relationships in her search for love.

Looking for love

At 18, Shereen moved to Miri, Sarawak, to pursue her studies in accountancy. There, she entered into her first same-sex relationship.

“We dated for over two years. I have a lot of love to give, so I was looking for someone I could pour all of my love into,” Shereen said.

The young woman broke the news about her sexuality to her mother over the phone. Both of them cried, but her mother took it in her stride.

Shortly after, Shereen moved to Perth, Australia, for her post-graduate studies. There, she found an environment that celebrated her same-sex attraction.

In Australia, Shereen (right) stepped into relationships with both genders, and seriously considered marriage with one of her ex-girlfriends.

“In Perth, I dated a girl, and it turned serious. We talked about marriage and settling down. It didn’t work out in the end, but after that relationship, I believed I would marry a woman,” Shereen said.

However, she stayed open in choosing her partners. For four years, Shereen moved in and out of relationships, dating both men and women, seeking love and companionship.

When her plans to stay in Australia fell through, Shereen found herself on a flight back to her hometown.

Pain that led to her surrender

Back in Kota Kinabalu, Shereen, then 25, began charting her career at an international hotel chain.

Heartbroken after yet another relationship fell apart in 2018, she decided to visit a local church. “I felt something within pulling me towards church,” she said.

Shereen with her supportive parents and sister, who walked closely with her through her debilitating health crisis. She is praying earnestly for their salvation.

She was warmly welcomed and soon joined a cell group. However, she stopped short of giving her life to Jesus.

Around this time, she entered into a relationship with a Christian man. He was kind, empathetic and patient – qualities Shereen admired. The relationship went on for three years, until a health crisis hit.

“I started experiencing unbearable back pain in July 2020 and was diagnosed with a prolapsed disc. I tried both Western and Chinese medicine, but nothing was able to provide relief,” Shereen said.

As the months rolled by, the young woman found herself unable to sit, lie down or sleep. Pain consumed her life.

It also drove a wedge in her relationship. She felt discontented due to unmet expectations, yet also wrestled with the guilt of being a burden to him. She eventually asked for a break-up.

One afternoon, she knelt on the floor and cried out to God, asking why she had to endure such suffering.

Suddenly, she heard God’s audible voice. “I will heal you in My time,” He said.

Immediately, Shereen felt a peace envelop her room. In the darkest season of her life, God had reached out to her.

She knew then that she had to give her life to Jesus.

Shereen watched YouTube art tutorials on days when she was in excruciating pain, and became a self-taught artist. Today, she runs Colours by Shereen, a Christian art business proclaiming God’s promises.

Picking up a Bible someone had gifted her, she began reading it daily. Every chapter fascinated her, and she developed an insatiable hunger to know more about God.

“Something stirred in my heart to enrol in the Rhema Bible Training School. I stood through the first class as my back pain was unbearable. But I began to realise the power of God’s Word, and the love of my Saviour,” she said.

Her pain progressively lessened over time, and last year she realised it was gone.

When God rewrites desires

As she grew in her relationship with God, Shereen found her heart being changed. “God’s love slowly aligned my desires to His will. As I grew to love Him, I realised there are choices we make that break God’s heart,” she said.

Until then, Shereen did not know that God’s design for marriage involved a man and a woman. She only discovered it as she began reading the Bible and plugging herself into the faith community.

“When that realisation hit, my own heart broke over my past choices, but in that moment I felt His overwhelming love. He has never condemned me,” she said.

On how God’s love transformed her, she added: “It wasn’t one dramatic moment. It was a journey. Through Scripture, prayer and the peace that came when I surrendered my desires to Him, He slowly reshaped the way I saw love and marriage. It didn’t feel like losing something, but like He was inviting me into something fuller and more meaningful.”

Instead of fixating on her same-sex attraction, she immersed herself in work, Rhema classes, personal study of Scripture and serving in her local church. She also surrounded herself with godly friends and chose to remain single for a season.

At Skyline SIB, Shereen’s (in purple) first friend was Yee Shien (top right) who also gave her a Bible. They are now close friends and have published a book, His Promises, together.

“God’s love is just so powerful,” Shereen said. “I wasn’t seeking clarity or striving to change, but slowly I lost all physical desire for women. When I see a girl who used to be my type, I feel no attraction anymore. I am so busy running to Jesus these days,” she said, her eyes lighting up.

Her newfound conviction, however, has not come without a cost. One of her friends could not accept her decision, and Shereen lost a dear friendship.

“I have accepted that there will be pruning. My hope is simply that my life and testimony will help others like me, and that I will point them to true freedom, love and peace,” she said.

The One

When friends share that they are struggling with their sexual orientation, Shereen encourages them not to focus on the issue, but on Jesus.

“It’s not just about getting out of somewhere, but having somewhere better to go. And for me, that is Jesus and God’s Word,” said Shereen, who co-leads a cell group in church and is also part of the hospitality team.

“In Christ, I’m learning that I am wonderfully made, deeply loved, and fully enough, not because of what I do but because of the grace and identity He has given me. This truth shapes how I live each day with confidence and peace.”

Shereen is now praying for two things: the salvation of her family and her future husband. She has stayed single since committing her life to Jesus, certain that in His time, He will bring a godly man into her life.

Recently, she has been meditating on John 4:34, where Jesus says: “My nourishment comes from doing the will of God who sent me, and from finishing his work.”

Shereen shared: “Everything about life used to drain me. But since I have begun walking with Jesus, choosing His will over mine, I have been so nourished and fed in body, soul and spirit.

“My life is filled with joy and peace. I have found the One.”

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